Turning it around:
Part 12 of the
How To Master Mentoring series

“Turning it Around” is the title of the twelfth and final episode of the “How to Master Mentoring” mini-series. I am David Felsenthal, or Rabi Dave and my podcast is “The Rabbi Who Got Rich on Sunday!”

In the How to Master Mentoring mini-series, each episode starts with a story of how a mentor taught me a valuable lesson and continues with one of the individuals I mentored in life and another in my side hustle business. This week I will talk about one of the hardest things to mentor someone through, which is turning themselves or their business around. 

Freud said that humans are geniuses at rationalizing and one of our biggest rationalizations to overcome is when we have had success in the past and that success stops.  We think we know what to do – keep doing what got us success in the first place.  That might be good advice when it comes to fundamentals but it is very likely that what worked before has changed and we need to turn it around and go in a new direction!

I’m Rabbi Dave, and most weeks, we explore the challenges and triumphs of achieving business success while living a #dreamlife. I hope you enjoy “Turning it Around!”

How to master mentoring Story #34: Mentors helping me turn it around

One of the hardest times in my career came at the beginning of COVID-19.  I had worked for the same not-for-profit as a kid participant, as a volunteer, and as a professional from 5th grade in the spring of 1978 until I was let go in June of 2020.  I had tremendous success in my career and although the Organization was going through a transition in leadership, I was shocked when they let their Chief Innovation Officer go just when innovation was needed most.  I did not know what to do and several mentors helped me not only to cope but to thrive in my new situation (I did not have to worry about finances because I had built a substantial side income with my direct selling business through e-commerce.

Issue 1 – I did not want to give up and fought to stay in the organization. When I was offered a trial extra year with the new administration, Howard Tzvi Friedman told me that it was a bad idea to stay.  He explained that the new leadership needed to create their own way and a senior person in such a high position as myself will always be in the way.  I knew everything about the organization and would always “know better” and that could never work.  It took about a year for that to sink in, but, it was great advice.

Issue 2 – After 36 years as a professional employee, I expected to leave with a nice exit plan.  The opposite was offered.  I did not want to be a bitter ex-employee because I did and still do believe that it is a great organization with amazing potential and I wanted to continue to be a supporter of their mission.  Rabbi Menachem Genack, Rabbi Steve Burg, and Lenny Bessler helped me position myself mentally, with the new administration, and in practice so that in the end I was treated very well and am still a big fan and supporter. I became a well-paid consultant to help some of the programs I had created and the organization threw me a very nice goodbye party which I still remember fondly.

Issue 3 – Now that I had the ability to work elsewhere, what would I do? Immediately upon hearing the news my old boss Rabbi Rafael Butler offered me a very exciting and innovative job with a nonprofit I had partnered with in projects many times.  He had tried to hire me before; but, I was happy where I was. Now I was free to explore other options.  I soon realized that many organizations I had partnered with in the past wanted my help and Rabbi Butler’s organization became my first and largest consulting client but by not belonging to any one organization I became available to help many others who were willing to spend what had once been a full-time salary for just a few hours of my work per week.  Financially, retiring and becoming a consultant turned it around for me and I quadrupled my nonprofit income almost overnight.

How to Master Mentoring Story #35: Turning it Around as a Mentee

Sometimes we dig ourselves into such a big hole personally that we feel there is no way out.  However, that is usually all in our mind and all we need is to take a step in the other direction and continue one foot after the other, and very quickly we’ve turned it around.

Jake F was a student on one of my Birthright trips.  He made fun of every speaker especially the ones who spoke about relationships, which made all the females on the trip angry at him.  The morning we climbed the mountain Masada to see this famous archeological site built by King Herod and used in the revolt against Rome he was accompanied by a young lady on the trip.  She asked him if he was planning on marrying a Jewish girl when it became the right time for him to get serious.  He responded, no way!  Jewish girls are unattractive.  Needless to say, he had dug probably the deepest hole that he could!

Friday night we prayed as a group at the Western Wall and the prayers were rocking!  The feeling of closeness to the creator was palpable and Jake came over to me crying like a baby.  He declared, Rabbi, I’ve never experienced spirituality like this before, I need more, the trip is ending soon, what can I do?  I said Jake, right behind us is a school called Aish HaTorah.  As soon as the trip ends, I can help you get accepted and they teach you how to develop a close relationship with the almighty, the answer to your prayers!

A couple of days later, Jake told me that he had been accepted into Harvard Medical School and he asked them for a leave of absence to study in Aish HaTorah for a semester before starting medical school and they said no.  My first thought was, Harvard! Let him just make a lot of money and support my programs! Then he said, “so Rabbi, I called my second choice Umass Amherst and they said yes, so I want to accept your offer!”

Not only did he turn it around spiritually but his is a great story of turning it around in every way as he married the girl from Masada and became a famous as he calls it “cardiologist” helping many many people turn it around as well.

How to Master Mentoring Story #36: Turning it Around in Business

David A was the classic definition of the right jockey on the wrong horse. He had worked as hard as anyone his entire life.  He worked his own lawn care business. He worked in sales for a network marketing telecommunications business. He probably worked hard on others that I don’t know about.  But no matter that he worked hard, did everything right, everything he was told to, he just couldn’t make ends meet in any of them.  When we met, I knew I had met a soul brother from another mother 😉 I told him that it was not his fault that he hadn’t had the success he needed yet.  It wasn’t that he didn’t work hard enough or do things the right way.  He was the right jockey for major success in the race of business.  He just needed to find the right horse.  Together we found the horse that was perfect for him and his skill set and within two years he had the income he desired, married his sweetheart, bought an RV and the truck to pull it, and started traveling to all the locations of his dreams and now 24 years later he still lives his #dreamlife.

How to Master Mentoring Recap and Weekly Podcast Challenge

I hope you enjoyed the twelfth and final episode in the miniseries “The Rabbi Who Got Rich on Sunday Shares Mentorship Mastery.” This week’s challenge is to look at your challenges or those of a loved one as an opportunity to turn it all around. Tell me what you find and please share your thoughts!

If you’re looking for a mentor and ready to take your personal growth seriously to see how it can transform your business, I’d love to help you. Visit my website and use the Work With Dave link to set up a free consultation. Let’s unlock your full potential together.

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